A woman's fall from grace

I once knew a woman in two life times. In the first we were both young and to a degree naive. It was in this period that she had a great impact on my perspective of women. See this woman, was all that I thought I could never attain. She was physically gorgeous, not the type of gorgeous that you want to put on a pedestal and look at. But the type of gorgeous that you see in person and say: "wow, there are women that look like that!" As well as being physically gorgeous she was kind, and had a warm demeanor that always made me feel comfortable. Although intellectually we had different interest, she was always able to hold a conversation on a variety of topics. She was shorter than I, had a body, could cook, was sassy...just everything that a man fantasizes about. It was because of this bond that we established and how much I respected her that she left such an ever lasting impression on me, Even as we went our separate ways.I came across this woman again, in another life time. Actually, I searched her out. Like before I found her to be every bit physically attractive as I had remembered. I still felt comfortable around her and conversation flowed. However, this time she had changed, she had become part of the "world;" Manipulative, cunning, using flirtation as a means to get "things" from men and, women; she had begun to drink-not to the degree of substance abuse but definitely more regularly than a social drinker. As well she had begun to smoke-legal substances but we are all aware of the consequences of this, especially in women.As time continued and I begun to engage her in conversation on how she felt about her current position in life and where she wanted to be and how she planned on getting there, I began to see the woman I had known before. I saw small pieces of the naïve, sincere woman that I once knew. And I thought, she's alive-I can see her! I could also see the turmoil that existed between what she once was and what she had become. I could see these two sides fighting each other for ownership of her.I saw all of these things and I wanted to grab her, and shake her, and say come back! Fight, fight like there is no tomorrow, fight, fight for your life, please damn you fight it! As I observed all these traits and behaviors my heart began to break. This once near perfect creature had fallen prey to society, the fake hair, the preoccupation with making money, living the fast life, drinking, smoking, men of no substance or who truly do not have her best intentions in mind. One morning I looked at her and could not help but shed a tear as I watched her sleep. For in this life the woman I knew no longer existed.I marveled at how much things had changed. Before I was the student and she was the teacher, she was far more advanced than I. She was more mature, and just had her shit together. Now I sat and gave her advice, tried to tell her that there is more to life than this. Now I sighed, as I became the teacher and she became the student. I once knew a woman in two life times. In the first we were both young and to a degree naive. It was in this period that she had a great impact on my perspective of women. See this woman, was all that I thought I could never attain. She was physically gorgeous, not the type of gorgeous that you want to put on a pedestal and look at. But the type of gorgeous that you see in person and say: "wow, there are women that look like that!" As well as being physically gorgeous she was kind, and had a warm demeanor that always made me feel comfortable. Although intellectually we had different interest, she was always able to hold a conversation on a variety of topics. She was shorter than I, had a body, could cook, was sassy...just everything that a man fantasizes about-and I cried cause this she no longer was.